Five Star Billionaire (Tash Aw)

 

It is safe to say that I have not read many English books written by Malaysians (despite being a Malaysian), neither have I shown much interest in them. But I knew I just had to read this after reading JoV's review

It is sad being a Malaysian Chinese. I have learned to accept everything but that doesn't mean I give in with resignation. I believe if one were determined to thrive, regardless of the system/ country/ whatever-it-is, he or she would still make it.

Back to the book, it was awfully comforting to read the familiarity, except the parts about Shanghai (because I have yet to go there). I identified myself with Phoebe  the most because I read self-help books, I rely on my personal mantras when things get tough and I do keep a goddamn diary which records everyday's challenge(s), fears and lessons learnt. As always, I was impressed with male authors who are able to narrate the emotional turmoils of the female well, particularly Yinghui's wish for a more intimate relationship with Walter. 

As much as I enjoyed reading this book (I actually read it on the way to and back from work), I doubt I wanna reread. It is simply too much to go through the pain and loss suffered by the characters. 

Naomi (Jun'ichirō Tanizaki)

I thought this would be my type of books, though I have yet to really "define" my taste. But more importantly, the sadistic side of me wanted to read stories about doormats. In this context, doormats refer to guys who continuously treat girls nicely despite being walked over. If we look at history, from Chinese Dynasties to Roman Empire, there were many instances of great heroes being taken in by the wiles of an enchantress. And it happens to people we know. I couldn't understand why they put up with heartless girls and let themselves be fooled, even though they know they are destroying themselves. I wondered do they even deserve sympathy for taking up the crap they have been put through.

Naomi provides a precious record of the marital relationship between Joji and Naomi, despite the distinct difference in their age, family background and education. Everything began with Joji's strong attraction to Naomi's name and Western look. 

" Whether Naomi's appearance would improve was something only time would tell; she was only fifteen then, and I viewed her future with both anticipation and concern. My original plan, then, was simply to take charge of the child and look after her. On the one hand, I was motivated by sympathy for her. On the other, I wanted to introduce some variety into my humdrum, monotonous daily existence. "

In short, Joji wished by having Naomi around would inject more excitement and warmth into his life. And it would be different from setting up a proper Japanese household,  which could be unappealing and tiresome. He tried to groom her by hiring an English tutor and sending her to have music lessons. Nevertheless, things didn't turn out as he wanted. He learned disappointedly that she was not as intelligent as he had hoped. His desire but her to become a fine woman was nothing but a dream.

" But at the same time, her body attracted me even more powerfully... ... There was nothing spiritual about it. She'd betrayed my expectations for her mind, but her body now surpassed my ideal. Stupid woman, I thought. Hopeless. Unhappily, the more I thought, the more I found her alluring. This was very unfortunate for me. Gradually I forgot my innocent notion of "training" her: I was the one being dragged along, and by the time I realized what was happening, there was nothing I could do about it. "

Stupid man. Little by little Joji was stripped off his resistance, confidence and sense of dignity. He became ensnared, gave in to Naomi's demands and rationalized her misconducts. And all this led to unforeseen misfortunes. Not to mention Naomi's extravagant spending and poor household management, which had gotten him into debts that he had to resort to lying to his mother for financial assistance. He could no longer perform at work. 

I never expected myself to get so angry as I was reading through this book. In fact, I was getting more and more disgusted at how pathetic Joji had grown into. He knew he was being a fool. He tried to get Naomi out of his mind when he threw Naomi out of his house. But he still let her back in his life again, even though he was certain of her ulterior motive. 

" My delusions grew more frenzied every day. I only had to close my eyes, and Naomi's image would appear. Often, remembering her fragrant breath, I'd look up at the sky, open my mouth, and take a gulp of air. Whenever I longed for her lips, whether I was walking down the street or closed up in my room, I'd look skyward and begin gulping. I saw Naomi's red lips everywhere I looked, and every breath of air seemed to be Naomi's breath. Naomi was like an evil spirit that filled the space between heaven and earth, surrounding me, tormenting me, hearing my moans, but only laughing as she looked on. "

Useless men. Nah, they don't deserve any sympathy if they are spineless.

P/S: Tanizaki's writing is beautiful. I am more interested to read from Naomi's (female) point of view about the manipulation and seduction.

Hell (Yasutaka Tsutsui)

Just a few days ago, an acquaintance of mine asked about my views on heaven, hell, afterlife (and many more which included religion) and I went dumbstruck. First, I honestly didn't see it coming. And I thought it was incredibly rude and offensive to bring up anything sensitive and not to mention, personal over a casual dinner date. Second, I never gave a damn thought on those mentioned. So I picked up Hell (which I stumbled across in the library) to read. 

So what is hell like in this novel?

" In Hell it was possible to view moments in another person's life simply by staring at them. There were no-comic-book-style balloons above their head to indicate what they were thinking, nor was it a form of mental telepathy. Instead, the truth was revealed through a kind of vision that crept up from the back of one's mind. " 

" Had the familiar looking man been right? Was Hell really just a place without God? Why did everything for which Takeshi had worked so hard now seem silly? Why did everything he suffer for and agonized over in his youth now seem laughable? Everyone who came to Hell seemed to feel the same way, and not just about their own lives. Everything that had happened in the real world - everything that must still be happening there - seemed utterly insignificant. Could that be the true nature of Hell? To make people forget their attachments to their previous lives? Was that the real reason for Hell's existence? "

Takeshi sees a number of familiar faces in Hell after his death. No matter how horribly he and these people have died, they are in immortal form. People are indifferent in attitudes and emotions even after reading each other's minds and revisiting the darker details of their formal lives. No jealousy, anger or hatred despite the betrayal, infidelity, revenge and other forms of harm human beings are capable of inflicting upon others. The resignation, the feeling of release from the affairs of the real world explains about the tranquility that everything they cared and all the desires are gone. Well, Hell does sound like a great place, no? 

The only problem I have is there are quite many characters entangled in this story with each of them connects to one another in one way or another. The shifting focus from one character to another makes it hard for me to follow so I have to refer back from time to time to keep track of them all. One thing if these characters are being freed from all worldly desires which include curiosity, then why are they still persistently wondering about questions such as 1) is it possible for someone to turn senile after coming to Hell?, 2) who is in charge as there has got to be some kind of system in place for managing things, even in Hell, 3) what could be the fate that awaits them when they leave Hell to move on? nothingness or heaven? and many more. 

Overall, it is dreamlike and funny, especially on how people view and react to death when it is approaching. I myself have come close to death once - nearly drowned at the age of 12. The only things I could think about at that time (which I still recall vividly until today) are how regretful I was for not listening to my parents (as they forbade me to play with water on that trip) and how sorry I was if I were to cause them sorrow.

" He fell to the floor, gasping, his mind growing dim. He was reaching the point of no return. But he'd be laughing stock, dying like this! Finally, he yanked out his dentures. The mochi stuck to the false teeth and slithered back up his throat as he pulled out of his mouth. 

How many times had he managed to cheat death? And how many more times would he do so before the end finally came? If he were younger, he might have rejoiced at having survived, but age had changed him. He was tired. " 

The Wild Goose (Mori Ōgai)

" The story is narrated by a friend and fellow student of the hero, Okada. It introduces us to three quite distinct though interrelated worlds of the Tokyo in the 1870s and 1880s. First is that of the students in the Tokyo University Medical Department - a world of young men living in cramped student boardinghouses, combing the secondhand bookstores for something to read, practicing jujitsu etc . The second world is that glimpsed through the figures of the moneylender Suezo and the heroine's father, the bumbling and unlucky candy seller. This is the complex world of plebeian Tokyo, where shrewdness and native wit rather than birth and education are what advance one's lot.  Third of the three worlds is the wholly feminine one inhabited by Otama, the young woman who becomes Suezo's mistress; Suezo's wife Otsune; the sewing teacher and her pupils; and the maids. "     

- Taken from the introduction translated by Burton Watson.

As much as I hate limiting my options, I tend to shy away from Asian Literature, particularly East Asian,  with Japanese Literature as the exception.

Otama had been living alone with her father since the death of her mother. Otama eventually agreed to be Suezo's mistress because of her obedient nature and the benefits that such an arrangement would bring to her father when things got harder for them. It was until later that Otama learned that she was a mistress of a despised moneylender. 

" In her mortification there was very little hatred for the world or for people. If one were to ask exactly what in fact she resented, one would have to answer that it was her own fate. Through no fault of her own she was made to suffer persecution, and this was what she found so painful. When she was deceived and abandoned by the police officer, she had felt this mortification, and recently, when she realized that she must become a mistress, she experienced it again. Now, she learned that she was not only a mistress but the mistress of a despised moneylender, and her despair, which had been ground smooth between the teeth of time and washed of its color in the waters of resignation, assumed once more in her heart its stark outline." 

" In her attitude toward Suezo she became increasingly warm as her heart grew increasingly distant. She no longer felt grateful for his favors or indebted to him, nor could she feel pity for him that this was so. It seemed to her that, for all her lack of fine upbringing and education, she was wasted on such a person. Among the people passing by her window, she began to wonder, was there not some trustworthy young man who would rescue her from her present predicament? It was when she first became aware of imaginings of this nature that she started in surprise."

She started to fantasize about Okada who passed outside her window. Although she knew perfectly well that when Okada started raising his cap in greeting one day, the action was done with no studied intention, Okada didn't mind. After their encounter over the snake, she was so overwhelmed with feelings that she wanted him for her own, more than an object of desire that she was keenly looking out for opportunities to approach Okada. Nothing happened as the circumstances had kept Okada and Otama apart before Okada left to study abroad. The character that has my most sympathy nevertheless is Suezo's wife, Otsune whose husband wouldn't even buy her and the children new clothes. Thankfully more and more women are becoming financially independent in this era. 

" Well then, what should I do? When I came home this morning,  I wanted to have it out with him as soon as possible. But suppose he had been there - what would I have said? Whatever I said, he would have come out with some vague, incomprehensible answer, the way he always does. And he would twist things around and in the end make fool of me. He's too cleaver a talker - whenever we argue, I always lose. Should I just keep quiet then? But if I do, what will happen? As long as that woman is around, he doesn't care what becomes of me! What should I do? What should I do? "

In all, I thought this is a masterpiece. It doesn't bother me that the romance between Otama and Okada never comes about in the story. I am especially amazed at how detailed the writer explored the emotional and mental lives of the female.

" For all women, there are things they regard as desirable but which they do not feel compelled to pursue. Such objects - a watch, a ring, displayed in the window of a store - they will invariably stop to look at as they pass. They do not go purposely to the store to see them, but, happening along on some other errand, they will nevertheless pause for a moment of inspection. Their desire to possess the object, and their resignation to the fact that they can never afford to do so, combine to produce not distress but rather a subtle, sweet sensation of grief that women look on as a kind of joy.  

The situation is quite different, however, when a woman makes up her mind to possess a thing. The emotion then is one of intense anguish. She thinks of the object until she can think of nothing else. Even if she learned that in a few days it would come easily into her hands, she could not bear to wait. Heedless of heat or cold, darkness or storm, she will lay her impulsive plans for the acquisition. " 

I have been impatient about many things in life and also, guys I seriously lay my eyes on. Many nights I spent on scheming just so I could get what I want step by step. I also recall being the aggressor in most of the short-lived relationships I have been in. Not that I ever had any regrets, I am just hoping to be more composed from now on :P

Dance Dance Dance (Haruki Murakami)

I tried my best not to search and go though online reviews about this book until I finished reading it. This is also the first ever Murakami's book I bought (with the RM200 vouchers given).

She is definitely calling me. From somewhere in the Dolphin Hotel. And apparently, somewhere in my own mind, the Dolphin Hotel is what I seek as well. To be taken into the scene, to become part of that weirdly fateful venue.

To return to the Dolphin Hotel means facing up to a shadow of the past. The prospect alone depresses. It has been all I could do these four years to rid myself of that chill, dim shadow. To return to the Dolphin Hotel is to give up all I'd quietly set aside during this time. Not that what I'd achieved is anything great, mind you. However you look at it, it's pretty much the stuff of tentative convenience. Okay, I'd done my best. Through some clever juggling I'd managed to forge a connection to reality, to build a new life based on token values. Was I now supposed to give it up?

The protagonist, whose name is not mentioned, has returned to the Dolphin Hotel in Sapporo. What was once a sad and peculiar hotel which buried deep in his memory has been transformed into a gleaming modern multistory building where the surrounding areas are booming too. From there, he makes friend with the receptionist with glasses, Yumiyoshi and a 13 years old girl, Yuki. He has also met and talked to the Sheep Man in his cramped room. While watching the movie Unrequited Love starring his former classmate (whose real name was Gotanda), he sees his missing ex-girlfriend, Kiki appear in one of the scenes. All sorts of strange connections are starting to come together.

Okay, I love this one!!! The reading started with quite a slow pace that at one moment, I thought I might give it up on. Lucky I didn't. Having read a few of Murakami's works, I thought this is the most logical I have read so far. There is nothing too absurd to follow. It can be summarized as a journey an ordinary thirty-four year old divorced man launched to reconnect with an old friend, reconsider meanings of loss and abandonment and lastly find love.

Thirty-four is a difficult age. A different kind of difficult than age thirteen, but plenty difficult. Gotanda and I were both thirty-four, both beginning to acknowledge middle age. It was time we did. Readying things to keep us warm during the colder days ahead.

Gotanda put it succinctly. "Love. That's what I need."

"I am so touched," I said. But the fact was, that's what I needed too. 

I love the murder mystery. It doesn't bother me whether or not Gotanda has indeed killed Kiki or Mei for that matter. And the friendship between the protagonist and Gotanda is well-evolved. In the last chapter, just when I thought the story would just end with a happy ending after the reunion of the protagonist and Yumiyoshi (which it eventually did).. but before that, Murakami did a great job at spicing it up with the suspense that the protagonist might lose Yumiyoshi in the dark. My heart skipped several beats. Dahlah I was alone in my apartment that night.

Yumiyoshi took the penlight from me and leafed through the pamphlet. I was casually observing my own shadow, wondering where the Sheep Man was, when I suddenly struck by a horrifying realization: I'd let go of Yumiyoshi's hand! 

My heart leapt into my throat. I was not ever to let go of her hand. I was fevered and swimming in sweat. I rushed to grab Yumiyoshi by the wrist. If we don't let go, we'll be safe. But it was already too late. At the very moment I extended my hand, her body was absorbed into the wall. Just like Kiki has passed through the wall of the death chamber. Just like quicksand. She was gone, she had disappeared, together with the glow of the penlight.

P/S: I am reading this for Haruki Murakami Reading Challenge 2012.   

After Dark (Haruki Murakami)

"Time moves in its own special way in the middle of the night."

What do u do after dark, when the night falls and u know dawn will not be there for hours?

I used to be nocturnal. I enjoyed the quietness, especially at the deeper stage of night when more and more people went to bed and I was still awake. In fact, in my second year of study, I kept the habit of sleeping around 7pm so that I could wake up at 12am to concentrate on whatever tasks I was doing - be it reading or finishing up assignments. When the night was nearly over, I would either grab a quick nap or jog to recharge myself before I started to attend classes with a cup of coffee. All these changed when I got myself a roommate who slept at 10pm.

"The giant digital screens fastened to the sides of buildings fall silent as midnight approaches, but loudspeakers on storefronts keep pumping out exaggerated hip-hop bass lines. A large game centre crammed with young people; wild electronic sounds; a group of college students spilling out from a bar; teenage girls with brilliant bleached hair, healthy legs thrusting out from microminiskirts; dark-suited men racing across diagonal crossings for the last trains to the suburbs. Even at this hour, the karaoke club pitchmen keep shouting for customers. A flashy black station wagon drifts down the street as if taking stock of the district through its blacktinted windows. The car looks like a deep-sea creature with specialised skin and organs. Two young policemen patrol the street with tense expressions, but no one seems to notice them. The district plays by its own rules at a time like this. The season is late autumn. No wind is blowing, but the air carries a chill. The date is just about to change."

Most Asian cities are vibrant and bustling by day and night. The night marks another new beginning, hardly the end of a day. And Murakami has just painted a picture of what it is like as midnight approaches in Tokyo, Japan.

I had meant to read After Dark for quite some time. I was curious with the kind of stories Murakami could weave around with night (and loneliness) as the theme. However, when I finally finished it, I was left puzzled. I must admit, I couldn't seem to find the true meanings of the stories as they were vague and bizarre (especially the part where Eri Asai was imprisoned in the TV set). How does one relate to another is another thing I couldn't comprehend. For example, Shirakawa, other than being the guy who beat up the Chinese prostitute.. the kind of involvement he has with Eri Asai is never clearly conveyed. Maybe the message is there, I just failed to grasp it.

While reading After Dark, I actually listed down every piece of song Murakami mentioned in the book then played them to get a feel of the atmosphere Murakami was trying to create. And one of them is "I can't go for that" by Hall & Oates. Overall, I like Sputnik Sweetheart and Kafka on The Shore better. Having said that, I still like After Dark quite a lot. I love the characters, particularly Mari Asai who is probably representing many young people these day who are aloof, cynical and indulgent in their own way. I know I am one of them. I also like the way he writes - it is always hard to predict how the story will progress (although it remains another question whether u can truly fathom it or not).

Sputnik Sweetheart (Haruki Murakami)

I was actually in a rush to finish the story (and review) before I started my industrial training.

This is not the first Haruki Murakami’s novel I have read. In the past, I have read Kafka on the Shore and I loved it very much. After that, I tried The Wind-up Bird Chronicle, which unfortunately I had to quit half way through due to the hectic semester but I intend to pick it up soon to reread.

I must admit, I have high expectations toward Haruki Murakami’s works after reading Kafka on the Shore. Perhaps that explains why I felt the disappointment, more and more especially toward the end of the story. To simply put, the story didn’t live up to my expectations. At one point, I was like “Yeah, this is it. This is exactly what I am looking for.” But at the end, I was let down. It is like one of those moments when you are teased and pained in pleasure yet the fun is denied when you are close to the point of orgasm. The feelings of emptiness lingered long after I closed my laptop.

What’s so fascinating about reading Haruki Murakami’s? The stories always bring me to somewhere unknown and unexpected. And whatever that is happening to the characters is beyond my imagination. In Kafka on the Shore, humans can communicate with cats and fishes (or was it something else) rain from the sky. Meanwhile in Sputnik Sweetheart, we are told the story of Miu’s hair turning all white after being abandoned on the Ferris wheel at the amusement park. All these never ceased to amaze me, thus provided me the much needed escape from reality.

Back to Sputnik Sweetheart, the theme revolves around sex, love and loneliness. I would say it is beautifully written - the unrequited love the narrator K has for Sumire, Sumire’s first love to Miu, a woman 17 years older than her and the oppressed love affair between K and his girlfriend, the mother of one of his students. The climax of the story is when Sumire goes missing during her trip to Greece with Miu. Whatever happened to her is never found out (and thus remained a mystery to the readers). While K and Miu carry on with their respective normal lives but part of them is dying with the gone of Sumire. I can't really pinpoint what but I expect more than that for the storyline laaaa. Also, one of the things I failed to fathom - what does the shoplifting incident have to do with anything? Perhaps it does signal an end to be put on K and his girlfriend’s secret love affair. But why is it necessary to K? Or maybe I should have taken my time to read it.

"Why do people have to be this lonely? What’s the point of it all? Millions of people in this world, all of them yearning, looking to others to satisfy them, yet isolating themselves. Why? Was the Earth put here just to nourish human loneliness?"

Never Let Me Go (Kazuo Ishiguro)

I knew the library CAIS have it on the shelves, but I never really bothered to check it out until I read about the film Never Let Me Go (starring Carey Mulligan, Keira Knightley and Andrew Garfield) based on the novel of the same name in one of the TIME issues. Then I did some Googling before I borrowed it. So yeah, I already knew about the twist before reading it.

I first started reading it right after my finals. But I only finished reading the story shortly before I went to Royals, which was about 1 week before the Christmas. I suppose I could have taken longer period of time to finish it but seeing that I was left with nothing much to do at home by that time, I could have finished it way earlier either. Like I said, I knew about the twist beforehand, hence I wasn't left that puzzled about many things (that went explained or unexplained) in the book.

The story started off with Tommy getting bullied by other students because of some silly harmless joke he pulled during the art class, and also because of his poor reputation for "creativity". There was once Kathy tried to be friendly to him and that was how their friendship was established. Later, Tommoy got into a relationship with Kathy's buddy, Ruth.

Growing up in Hailsham hadn't been easy. There were so many unwritten rules the students imposed on themselves. There were topics they avoided because bringing up would make their guardians awkward whenever they came near this territory. Kathy, Ruth, Tommy and other students at Hailsham had been constantly reminded of how special or important they were, that they must always keep themselves well and healthy. They were different from their guardians, and also from the normal people outside. Nevertheless, they didn't really know what that meant until they were older.

Mind u, even though these kids were "different" and they were isolated from the outside world, they were nonetheless like u and I when there were cliques, dramas occurring in daily life and they were curious about sex when they had entered the teenage years. But none of them would live the way they planned, either being the film stars or working in supermarkets. And this is because "Your lives are set out for you. You'll become adults, then before you're old, before you're even middle-aged, you'll start to donate your vital organs. That's what each of you was created to do. You're brought into this world for a purpose, and your futures, all of them have been decided." Yeah, the twist is they were cloned for organ donating purpose.

After they moved and lived at the Cottages, one day Kathy decided to leave to start her training to become a carer after something happened between her, Tommy and Ruth. Of course, the three of them met again and spent some time together many years later before Tommy and Ruth had had their last donation and died. Also, Tommy and Kathy at last did go to see one of their guardians, Miss Emily and Madame. A lot of mysteries which puzzled them in those early days were answered. Like why Madame turning up several times each year to select their best work etc.

It is not like I didn't enjoy this book. I did. But I started to skim through it upon entering those chapters where the characters met each other many years later. It seemed like I lost my interest or maybe all I needed was more time. And last but not least, although Ruth was the bad guy in the story, I couldn't help but like her. Yes, she was indeed manipulative and selfish.. but I believe under most circumstances, that's how it should be, especially when u are on your own.

P/S: Looking forward to get a soft copy of the film itself!!! Wanna watch Keira Knightley.

(Once again, think it's a bit too long. Also, I seriously need to work on my writing. And it obviously took me ages to finish a review too :S )